Faux Pas it Happens

“It’s not fun when a baby licks you. They’re tongues are like…white cuz all they eat is milk. It’s adorable. But not fun to be licked by a baby.”
— Heather and Jolie (bus conversation)
“Let’s get a whole bunch of meat and sell it.”
— Heather (My friend) 

In fact, today we did try to record our ‘bus conversation’ as we call it. Appearantly we kind of freak out when we know there is a recorder and we don’t say as many strange things. It actually went from hilarious to ackward-stagefrighty-ness in a matter of seconds… lol. guess we just need someone to record us secretly…hmm…

My friend and i really need to record our conversations on the bus in the morning. It’s funny as hell because its all this random shit we say while we’re still only half away and the caffine just kicking in. 

“In (Insert name here)’s world, hobos sleep on the fake beds in JcPenny.”
Faux Pas

French for “False Step.” 

urban dictionary

Freudian Slip

A typo, misspelling, or slip of the tongue of which is thought to reveal a hidden subconscious emotion.
Examples of a Freudian Slip:

Typo: I like Dick. (I like Rick) 
Misspelling: I wish you were her. (I wish you were here) 
Slip of the tongue: *Gets slapped by his wife* “Cow!” (Ow!)
“Look! Now you’ve got me slouching down like a guy playing video games!”
Failing at wanting a glass of lemonade…

*Drinking glass of water* Finds it a boring glass of water…

*Turns to friend*

“Hey do you have any lemonade sauce?”

Friend: *bursts into laughter…* “What the heck is lemonade Sauce?” 

Then hands me instant ice tea packet anyway.

C.O.D.

So my friend thinks he can teach me how to play Call of Duty. (I suck at video games) 

The result? 

He kills my player 17 times in a row…

Then i actually manage to kill his player.

My reaction:

I killed you! i killed you! i killed you! look! theres you’re body, just lying there. Because you’re dead. I killed you.

Meanwhile he sneaks up behind me and kills me again.